We were coming to the end of a one-shot my girlfriend was DMing. As we were about to walk into town we were greeted by a Noble and a group of mercs. This noble was demanding that he get his ring back that my brother (Halfling Cleric) had apparently stolen after a night of drunken debauchery. He began a speech
Cleric: An old mentor of mine, taught me many things. He taught me methods on how to survive *Pulls of ring* you want this ring?
The rest of the party is hanging on to the edge of their seats at this point as he pauses
Cleric: GO GET IT *Throws the ring and runs off into the other direction* STREET SMARTS!
The entire table erupts in laughter as we skip the final encounter of the night by using the JJ Bittenbinder Method.
No porn on tumblr we describe our nudes in detail instead
today I was wearing a black corset with matching lace around it and a black leather miniskirt, pink fishnets and black combat boots. I was wearing black lipstick, white foundation, black eyeliner and red eye shadow. A lot of preps stared at me. I put up my middle finger at them.
I watched the whole buzzfeed unsolved on this and that dude was a fucking menace and a pedo, he stayed getting arrested but he had a lawyer that would get mobsters off charges so he kept going free, the whole town hated the shit out his ass, had a town hall meeting about how to deal with him one day, someone said him and his wife turned up at the bar down the road during the meeting, everyone in the meeting was like “let’s ride” walked down there silently, he was getting in the truck with his wife to leave they SNATCHED his wife out the truck and everyone watched him get murdered and the police investigated, the town said they didn’t know who did it, ain’t snitch on who came up with the plan or nothing the town was really like this
They tracked the person down and it turned out to be a woman from Scotland whose baby *really* loved Bee Movie to the point that it was the only thing that stopped him crying. So she just played it over and over. The endurance. She must have been exhausted.
concept: we’re dancing in your kitchen late at night. it’s summer and the windows are open. I can’t help but laugh as I trip over my own feet. you kiss me softly and the warm breeze coming through the windows is sweet and smells like cherries. everything is wonderful.
i hate so much when rich people claim they could live on minimum wage
you can’t. you absolutely fucking can’t.
it’s not just about how literally impossible it can be or how the rich are so accustomed to luxury they wouldn’t be able to stomach being poor – it’s about the fact that any experience rich people have had with poverty was temporary.
“to prove that $8/hr is humane i lived on minimum wage for a month – and it was fine. you just have to spend wisely and be frugal.”
i promise any rich person who’s done (if they even have) something like that was ACHING by the end of that month. that week. they were edging out the end of that month thinking “after this i can go back to my cozy $100k a year, i just have to get this month over with”
it’s livable, right? this guy proved it. one month and he’s sure – it’s totally doable! he ate gross food and kept his lights off and his AC off and scrounged up change for gas for a month and it wasn’t THAT bad!
but man…. imagine if that was your whole life.
i’m sure they felt a little stressed after realizing how tight the budget was at the end of that month… imagine that but for years. years and years with no end in sight. you never have the relief of going back to your $100k salary and flat screen TV. it’s years upon years of pent up stress and anxiety
what if your car breaks down? what if you miss your bus? what if you have an unexpected charge on your card and overdraft? what if the kids want pizza? what if you call out sick from work? what if you can’t afford christmas presents?
and on top of the stress, you’re poor and you don’t have much free time because you take all the hours you can get to make ends meet. instead of cooking you have to eat shitty banquet and michelinas meals because delivery and takeout are too expensive. and the more tired you get, the more exhausted, the more shitty food you consume just to try to keep going.
and you probably don’t have good healthcare!
you’re stressed, you’re eating poorly, your body hurts from all the work and you’re too poor to pay for medical help, things like car repair fall by the wayside in order to provide, you’re sad, you start drinking to cope, etc
this is the cycle poor people are fucking trapped in. this is why the minimum wage is a fucking failure to all impoverished people in america.
this is the toll “just being frugal” takes on poor people after living for decades like that. adddiction, mental illness, lawbreaking – these things are associated with low class and poor people because it’s what happens to us and what we resort to when the system fails us.
